daily gripe

please god. let me let go.

remember my dog joey? remember when i wrote about him having the hole in the anal track and hence needing manual movement of his bowels?he bled a small puddle of blood from the anal regions in the night.

i spent the last 45 mins or so, just talking to him. telling him that i love him and that i am so glad that he played such a major part in my life as i was growing up. told him that should the pain or the trauma of his condition be too much, that he should let go. i will understand. i pray to god that i will understand. but how do you let a lifetime friend go? *gloom*

he shivered earlier this evening when i was doing the manual movement. i have never seen him shiver before.not when i was young and still frightened of the dark, and there was a power failure. i hugged onto him for protection and comfort as we waited for the power to restore. not when i used to run out after an argument with my parents, and i would stay there at the back of the house with him for hours. he always calmed me down so much. *more gloom*

when i was talking to him just now, he moved his head kinda. and also shaked his leg when i scratched his itchy area. but i couldn't bear to move him around and make him stand so that i could check for more blood. i will bring him to the vet sometime this month. i promise.

*deep deep gloom*

posted by inspirethereal @ 11:32 PM